Uncle refuses to get nephew an interview at his company, after he shows no genuine interest or preparation, despite helping other nieces and nephews get interviews in the past, sparking drama with brother and SIL: 'He couldn't even do the bare minimum'

Does a family title automatically secure you the role of a certified 'Nepo Baby', or is it earned? 

Ahhhh, nepotism…

One of our favorite topics when it comes to climbing the corporate ladder…or, in this case, simply trying to take the first step.

We can't choose the families we are born into. Whether your mother is a partner at your state's biggest law firm or your uncle holds the key to the city's… McDonald's. We do not have the luxury of choice. Yet that does not mean we lack the ability to shape our own futures and create the lives we dream of. For those less fortunate, however, such outcomes require hard work, grit, and effort…something not every individual is as willing to offer.

There is likely far more nepotism around us than we'd like to admit. It has simply been the way the world has worked for centuries. But what benefit does it bring to society to place people into valuable roles they have not earned? This uncle appears to have reflected deeply on that question and applied his key takeaways within his own family. Doing so not merely at their expense, but at the expense of his own reputation and that of others.

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  • This uncle works for a large organization that often takes on interns and had previously secured interview spots for some of his hardworking nieces and nephews, without guaranteeing positions. However, his nephew, Eric, had just recently graduated from college. To put it kindly, Eric is not the most ambitious of all his cousins, and his uncle is a bit skeptical after his mother reaches out for him! At first, he denies her request, stating that if her son were interested in scoring an interview with the company, he expects him to be the one reaching out…

    When he finally does, it is made clear that he has only reached out at his mother’s insistence, showing minimal genuine interest in the company, and failing to explain basic reasons as to why he is interested in receiving the internship. When asked to write a short explanation regarding his motivation, his submitted response is clearly AI-generated…Leading his uncle to refuse to recommend him for a position he clearly doesn't deserve, and putting his own reputation and credibility at risk. As expected, the response from his brother and SIL is far from understanding…As they go on to express what some call valid reasons, and others, excuses, about why their son deserves this chance! Even though this uncle feels confident in his decision, he is still trying to juggle the guilt that comes with disappointing a family member. 

  • Lazy young adult lying on the couch and typing on his laptop on the floor
    via africa-images

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA for not getting my nephew an internship interview after getting them for most of the others?

    I work for a large organization that brings on interns, and over the years I have gotten most of (but not all) my nieces and nephews interviews.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • They are never guaranteed spots. All I do is get them in the interview pile. My nephew is graduating.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • His mom (my SIL) asked me about the internship, and I told her that Eric needs to be the one to reach out to me.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • When he finally came to me, it was obvious he was just doing it because she told him to.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • He did not seem interested, and if I am honest, the way he speaks is childish.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • It's all braindead "bruh" "fam" tiktok speak. He could not articulate WHY he wanted the internship.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • Two people sitting in an office job interview
    via gettyimagespro

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I told him that if he really wants this, I need him to show me, and asked him to write me a brief note giving me the reasons he wanted the internship and what he planned on doing with the experience.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • I was surprised he sent me anything at all, but when I read it, it was obviously generated.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • I told him that I could not put in a good word for him because he could not even do the bare minimum.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • He had a complete meltdown over it, telling me that I was being unfair and that no one these days actually writes stuff like this.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • His mom came at me too saying the same things. I told them both that I'm not going to risk my own reputation.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • I asked him, point blank, WHY do you want this internship? "I dunno" My brother made the case that my nephew had struggled during the pandemic, the academic landscape has changed, and he needs someone to give him a chance to show what he can do.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • And that years ago, someone had given me a chance despite not being a straight A student, which is true.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • Part of me thinks I should get him an interview just so he can see how unprepared he is, but I know that would be a mean thing to do.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • Am I wrong to not get him an interview? Is this just how kids are these days?
    via LilTomatillo13
  • Senior man and woman arguing inside their home, while he questions her
    via minervastudio

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • glib_result NTA, you ARE giving him a chance to show what he can do. The problem is that he's not willing to do what it takes to take advantage of that chance. I am curious, how much older is the last niece/nephew that you helped?
    via glib_result
  • OP LilTomatillo13 She graduated two years ago, and she did get one of the internship spots.
    via LilTomatillo13
  • NTA Odd-End-1405 Never risk your reputation for someone undeserving. The pandemic has been over for years. Yes, someone gave you a chance years ago. Did you at least put in some effort for and with that chance? He obviously failed to put in any effort to get the chance. Do you really think he would succeed and actively participate if he was provided the opportunity? You don't want to be THAT guy.... The one who pushes off his waste-of-space relatives on the company/interviewer. We have all worke
    via Odd-End-1405
  • claudster57 NTA, he didn't put in the effort to even ask you for the interview. My initial advice was just to get him the interview to let him mess it up himself, but you have to think about how that would reflect onto your professional career
    via claudster57
  • NTA Mira_DFalco You did give him a chance to show what he could do. Apparently, it's the absolute bare minimum, and with an attitude. I don't blame you at all, your credibility would suffer if you recommended someone that unmotivated.
    via Mira_DFalco
  • Soft-Current-5770 Are we at a stage where people SERIOUSLY believe "I dunno" is s complete sentence???
    via Soft-Current-5770
  • EwwDavvidd NTA. This is a good opportunity for your SIL and nephew to work with a guidance counselor or workforce counselor to address what his interests, skills, and abilities are. Perhaps he could take a few classes at a vocational school. If I were in your shoes, I would not feel comfortable putting him forward either. Its your professional reputation at stake. You did well to stand up for yourself.
    via EwwDavvidd

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